am working now at Serangoon... haix... dunno y... all of a certain, i was attacked by a flood of depression... not that i get depression that easily... bt haix, dunno lehx... future was so near yet so far... today mum was at the kitchen... she looked at our spoilt hanger, then she turned to me... she said: Al, tt time u told me, once u graduate, the first pay u will help me buy a new one de... nw i hv to wait for one more year le... haix... felt even more guilty.. not that i say she isn't sensitive or anything, bt i hadn't recover from the wound i had stabbed myself with... really felt like crying...

den just nw at the CC, got almost the scare of my life... two students came down and told me a pair of legs was stucked outside of the cubicle in the toilet... so i rushed up to the toilet... there it was, i saw a pair of bare footed legs sticking outside a closed cubicle door... i dunno wat was it that grabbed me, i knew i hv to remain calm coz there was two kids watching... so i started knocking before banging and shouting into the room, no reply... i called the CC ppl, and asked them to gather help. All that was crossing my mind was "wat if..." not wanting to break down, i tried busying myself to questioned the students when and how they discovered the lady... trying to distract myself from the possibility of that "wat if"

When the help came, with Edward, Aaron Wilson n this shisaga lady... i tried to relate what happened... Shisaga observed the leg and stated it's slightly blue from lack of blood... Edward banged the door with no response... Aaron called the ambulance and police... Wilson climbed over the cubicle and shook at the lady to get response

... the lady slowly opened her eyes... and told us SHE WAS JUST SLEEPING!!!!! oh man, u shd see everyone's expression at that moment... it was almost exasperated and yet hilarious... bt wat if that wasn't a happy ending? Shisaga was deeply affected coz her grandma had DIED in a toilet... so it isn't a joke altogether rite? I blamed myself for not doing more and causing the panic... i felt like idiot coz i din't dare to peep inside for the possibility of seeing a corpse... all the years of training at First Aid has came down to nothing coz i realise i m a coward... haix... Shisaga was a lady, bt she actually peeped into it and informed us that the lady was lying against the toilet bowl when everyone was banging at the door...

weird things happen at the CC... tis is my last wk working there... just hope to make it a peaceful one... a correction for my previous post... life is certainly is a bed of roses, bt now i'm just at its thorns.. to pick myself up to lie back on the petals, i hv to study hard. I guess i need to mix with real frenz who can motivate me to study... oh man.. last chance...!!!

anyway, not everything was terrible lahx... went nite cycling with laopos, bro, jiawen n wenjie n yaosheng + suting... shall upload the photos soon... i realise my eyes look v sunken these days... someone told me before youngster shd hv vibrant and lively eyes.. y are my eyes sagged? when will my dark clouds be cleared????